A haiku for those that are no longer physically here, but are a constant presence in our lives. I was missing my father on his birthday and wrote this with him in mind. I hope others can also find comfort in the words. – Kat
Why are we so proud of our ignorance, lack of empathy, and education?
Taking the time to learn new things, and truly be a global citizen should not be seen as a bad thing. We force labels on each other, we bully, and mock those who think differently than us.
What’s on my mind? Kindness, and a desire to learn about and understand others.
Like so many out there, this is the face of depression. I live with Major Depressive, and Anxiety Disorder. Both are treated with medication. Some days are easier to function in than others. To many I seem like a very laid-back, and cheery person, underneath that mask is a person who fights an internal war daily to keep positive, and motivated. If you can relate, know that you are not alone! #BreakTheStigma
At the time of this blog, I’ve since recovered and returned to work. Thankfully things for me were mild, so I was able to stay home, and just recoup there. It was definitely not the way I wanted to have a leave from work, but I was glad I was able to get paid for the time I was off.
So what did I do with my time? Aside from taking medicine and sleeping. I played Cyberpunk 2077, which I beat during my time off, and watched a lot of Netflix! Finished Bridgerton. Loved that show. Started another called The King: Eternal Monarch. I love that one too. It’s a K-Drama. Watched a lot of Guy’s Grocery Games, Triple D, and Iron Chef America. I also did a lot of reading, and some writing. It wasn’t a complete waste of time, I tried to keep myself busy to keep from thinking about being sick.
Hope all is well with you, and I’ll see you again soon.
Well, as of this writing, I had been confirmed to have Covid. After months of successfully avoiding getting sick, the virus first came to touch my home just before Christmas. My husband was sick with it, many of the symptoms were there. Loss of taste/smell, aches, severe fatigue. I helped him as much as I could through those times. It seemed to leave me alone. Testing negative, I went back to work. Because instead of paying folks to steer clear of work, they want you back as soon as possible. Right after, I started exhibiting symptoms as well. and a week after testing negative, I was tested again with more symptoms apparent and a positive diagnosis. Fortunately, I was able to see what the symptoms were and act quickly or instead of writing this post from home, I’d be writing it from the hospital.
I can say for sure that 14 days from 1st symptom to work return really isn’t enough, especially if you actually have the illness. Maybe a single person that could work, but when you have multiple people in your household? I don’t think so!
The process of trying to heal while you have a job are pretty stressful. There are no standardized forms for hospitals to give you that could work with your HR. Your HR makes it a point to bother you about documents that really could wait while the employee tries to heal. It’s just a big uphill battle. Meanwhile, you’re in the hospital or at home trying to hold on. I wish I could tell you that this gets easier, but it doesn’t. I’ve about hit my frustration level for today, so I’ll end this post. I’ll try to keep updating this as the craziness goes on. Someone needs to be honest about this process.
On Christmas Day, I saw this headline from Rolling Stone:
It made me think about when I was younger. Michael Alig and the Club Kids were people I saw on Donahue, and they made me imagine a larger world. I wanted to get out of my small-town life, run away to New York City, and reinvent myself as they did.
I remember watching Donahue when I was young and seeing the “Club Kids” on TV. I started to dream of running away to NYC and just becoming someone else. That was me being a kid in a small town, without too many creative outlets. So instead of running away, I created characters.
Then I heard about the dark side of being a Club Kid. The drugs, excess, and violence. I still wanted to be part of a stranger world, but not one like that. Sad to see his life ended this way, but at the same time it made me think.
Maybe that was the way it was meant to be. I don’t know. It’s very possible that going to prison is what allowed Mr. Alig to stay alive as long as he had. I remember hearing about when he was due to be released. I followed his Twitter account and website just to see how much he had changed. He still was fiery and had a babyface when he got out. I wondered if he would try to recapture his glory days like so many try to once they return home. For a while, it looked like he would be okay. He was creating art and doing interviews.
Then I stopped following. My curiosity waned. The glamour faded. That’s what happens when the idols don’t live up to the hype. They become a morbid curiosity. I didn’t find myself wishing for younger days, it made me more hopeful that I’ll find a way to make my mark in the future. Maybe that is what an idol is for, a jumping point for a person to find their own greatness.
I’m a bit of a hair chameleon. Decided it was time for a change. I went from blonde curls with a bit of a shag around the sides, to completely shaving the sides, and leaving the top, which is now a bright blue. I’m feeling a bit punk with this look, and I LOVE it!
chasing wide eyed dreams
barely in sight, out of reach
tumbling, falling down